I am currently going thru the same rollercoaster. To get out if this madness you have to replace gambling routine. Replacing routines helped for me and I believe that it will help for you. Find something that can replace the trill you receive from gambling, it can be anything – going for a walk, joining a gym or finding a new hobby.
Considered self-exclusion. There are many websites, for example https://www.gamstop.co.uk/.
I believe that you will recover and never gamble again!