I am currently going thru the same rollercoaster. To get out if this madness you have to replace gambling routine. Replacing routines helped for me and I believe that it will help for you. Find something that can replace the trill you receive from gambling, it can be anything – going for a walk, joining a gym or finding a new hobby.
Considered self-exclusion. There are many websites, for example https://www.gamstop.co.uk/.
I believe that you will recover and never gamble again!
Thank you so much for your message, it means a world to me at this moment. Today I closed my website which generated new casino players and I decided to change my life. I applied for volunteer work at a crisis and counseling center. I am currently waiting for their response.
I am going thru the same pain and I truly believe that you will never go back to gambling again. I can totally agree with Meghna83 message, that you should close the gambling accounts like an old book.