So today I relapsed, already.
I found out that my cars MOT had run out and panicked. I had sold some things on eBay so I put £10 in my account. I ended up withdrawing £250.
Although I can now pay for my MOT this has kind of turned out bad. I need to not think oh yeah I’ll give it a go if I need money for something because that won’t happen. I need to retrain my brain.
So day one starts again.
I just thought that I might add the obvious. I have always been depressed, well not always just for a very long time and this hasn’t helped. I’m hiding away from my friends, I’m not being social and my depression is awful at the moment. I am having panic attacks in the evenings and not sleeping very well at all.
This is one of the many reasons I need to sort this out.
ive now told one of my male friends everything and he is being very supportive and hasn’t shown as much disappointment as I thought he would. I was expecting it to be awful, but he has been so supportive. That is making me feel a lot better about kicking this bad habit