Shaun you are doing so well. Im happy for you and your family. Its those who we love so much who we strive to be the best for. Your posts tells a story of my life in many ways..i have thought on more than one occasion WOW finally found others who understand the emotional and financial dread that i feel..yet also understand the urge to escape to the one thing.. the false dream that we think that gambling will bring ..the financial means to change our and our families world..but that ends up being our nightmare because we CG if we have “hit” we think its our big day and keep playing. Those normal people who would only take so much money for gambling would stop. Not me it had to be my lucky day when i get hit. Only to turn from wining to chasing to broke..stressed depressed felt like everyone would be better without me..yet when those intense emotions would pass and thank God they did for me i just felt like a loser and let down on those who depended on me so much..i haven’t gambled since 9/25/17 and the mountains and valleys are still there but atleast i know i cant do it on my own , im not alone, and i did not gamble today..this site. ,GA meeting and individual therapy are my tool box and as long as i am actively participating in my addiction my tool box is my resource i go to for support understanding and strength to say ..i will not gamble today.. So much for my rambling. I am proud of you for today you did not gamble. Have a good night and enjoy your family.
