[liamh35]

Yes family have control again. And I battle with my demons of thinking I deserve control and trust, but I reality that’s just me convincing myself I have self control when I don’t.

I agree, changing everything is something I must do, envioronment, routines and how I spend spare time is a big deal when it comes to my life. I have no hobbys or anything of interest that keeps me stable. Sleeping long hours and achieving nothing allows my brain to fester a feeling of low self esteem and in turn I look to gambling to possibly find a feeling I’ve felt before after a big win. A big win just gives me the feeling like I can do something! I need to find that within myself and use it to my advantage. Win with life and not by gambling.
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