Dear diary,
I would never envy those mentors I met in the last 10 years, I could never forget hearing them getting scolded by the same people who seek them for help, these people are sick and hurting inside and their mind is in a mess.
Nothing has changes in the past and now, those hurting, not ready and not willing to change are still questioning and challenging the messenger instead of keeping things simple by following simple instructions, these sick people do not trust the messenger and are not open minded to try some thing new when all else have failed, they still want to do it their way.
I am afraid that I do not have the right to be inconsiderate and unsympathetic to these people simply because I was behaving like them for many years in the past. When I describe them, I remember myself in the early days.
When the messenger was not perfect in their delivery, I would love to question and prove the other person wrong, I was just ignorant, proud and arrogant.
It was so stupid of me to do all that because end of the day I do not get anything good in return, but pride make me so sick I could not stop myself, I have to tear the other person, prove them wrong and bring them down.
The saddest part end of the day was the fact that I was still suffering inside, all that I have done did not make me feel better but not the other person who have found peace and joy in life.
Having said all that, I still do not wish to be like my mentoring friends yet I do realized that life is so fragile and we always take for granted living life like it was going to last forever.
I am afraid that if I do not go ahead to do something good when I have the chance now, it may be my last chance in life, I may live to regret not having done that when I can.
Everything is new to me and I still do not have all the answers. I just have to trust my Higher Power to lead me.
Help me God.