Hey S, can totally relate to your story. The ups, the downs, winning big and then blowing it all. Although my vice isn’t the slots, the patterns are undoubtedly the same.
It’s not going to be easy going cold turkey but if you haven’t already done so you should try self-excluding and installing a blocker. I believe Betfilter works on ios. Take it one day at a time, the feelings of anxiety and regret will lessen over time. Good luck.