Hello Lynloos and welcome to this site. I’m glad you have found this place where you can share your experiences and receive support. I can imagine how worn out you are by the struggles you describe.
To access the best support in the Forum section, it is best that you start your own thread in the Friends and Family section. Then you should receive replies specifically for yourself and you can keep your own ‘story’ all in one place. (Of course, you can send replies to others too, if you wish). So go to Forums, then choose Friends and Family, next go to the bottom left of that page and choose ‘New Topic’. You can then start your very own thread.
You can use the live helpline too when it is open and also take a look under Support Groups and log in when there is a suitable one on, so you can communicate ‘live’.
Best wishes,
Monique