Thank you Micky.
I find myself making choices I thought I would never make .
I find myself making more permanent decisions .
I have always lived as if stuff in my life was temporary.
Take my house – I always complain about how messy it is but in truth I have always been afraid to make the changes which would make this housework for me – in case I want to sell, in case I decrease its value, in case I get it wrong …
Today I am thinking , two decades later , I am going to make this house work for me and my family not someone who might own it after me . Why had this taken me so long to reach this decision? Who was I preserving it for ?
I have been funded for a quite prestigious course- I have completed much of it – however my current family circumstances means it cannot be a priority for me but I am finding it so difficult to let it go. Why? There are so many things which matter more in my life . What will I really lose ?
Why do I find these things so difficult and can anyone else make sense of what I am saying?
I’m not sure even I can .