Thank you Kathryn and Micky for the kind responses.
We just got back from church and you would think that being there helps. Well it does, and I didnt think about gambling at all until we were leaving. As I got in the car with my family, I had the thought…now what are we going to do for the rest of the day. (Momentary strong thoughts of gambling, then remembered…oh yeah, cant we would be trespassing)
Of course many weekend afternoons, we would get the kids all settled with their things and my husband and I would take off to the Slots. It was normal for us to go 8 hrs on a Sunday.
Thinking to be home by 10pm usually not home until 2am and having to both work the next day. Almost always not leaving until there was no way to access more money. Worrying about gas money, lunch money for the 16 yr old and so on the drve home.
We had lunch at church today, a potluck, and somehow brought home more food than we brought. Thank God as are cubbard is close to bare. I am so glad to not have to live the double life today. Feeling like such a hypocrite was tiring and made me very ashamed. We should be able to help others who are less fortunate, but our gambling took all our money away. We have been terrible stewards. Not anymore! We will get this debt turned around and instead of giving 4k to the casino before Christmas maybe we will be able to help a family in need this year.
We will not be doing that again today. So it looks like The NFL games today and maybe some laundry.
Feeling good about the changes today.