Hi Jansdad, I can’t understand why anyone who seriously wants to give up gambling would want to watch somebody else doing it. Maybe that time would have been better spent getting some help for yourself sorted out. I’m pleased that you know now it’s something that you will have to avoid.
But hey ho, as you said in your previous post we all have to find our own way through this. Just because getting ongoing support and living each day as it comes works successfully for thousands of recovering addicts throughout the world, dosnt mean it will work for you. (Personally I think it will work for you if you tried, you’ve gotten to day 20 one day at a time)!
“The truth is I love gamblers, I love socializing with them and being around them. They don’t judge you, they don’t have prejudices, they’re generally a nice, fun bunch.”
People who are recovering from any addiction, including gambling, can be the most sincere and genuinely decent people you can come across and the above descriptors do apply, however problem gamblers and compulsive gamblers in denial or in action I’ve found can be the most arrogant and vile people and that certainly applied to me whilst I was gambling. Low life scum is how I would describe myself looking back to the times I gambled.
What is there to love about people who lie cheat and steal?
Maybe you’ve never sunk to the depths that I and many others have sunken to in order to feed our gambling habit, and you’re very fortunate if that’s the case, and it’s really great that you’ve come looking for help before its gone that far.
You said in an earlier post;
“ For me it doesn’t really matter so much if I gamble 30 days a month or 2 days a month. I will lose maximum I could possibly lose for a given time period.”
I can’t agree with that either. You still have your wife and family, a home, a job and,” at least half a dozen computers and other devices I could play on if I really wanted to.” Personally I don’t think you’ve ever lost the maximum you could but I think if you don’t make your current abstinence the foundation for a sound recovery then you aren’t too far away from doing so.
Getting through each day without gambling is a great achievement for any of us but having a frequent struggle with urges and cravings is no fun and that’s not what lifes about.
I downloaded the book by Allen Carr you and Jen have mentioned and read the first couple of chapters, this book might help you and I with our recoveries but I don’t think it will by salvation for any compulsive gambler.
I know that my gambling saturated every aspect of my life, I would be utterly consumed by it, the chaos in my life gambling brought wouldn’t disappear only because I changed the way I thought. I havn’t read the whole book yet but I am enjoying it, but I know it dosn’t hold all the answers, well not for me anyway.
You may think I’m having “a go” at you, that is not the case. Like every one of us there is a chance you will never gamble again. You obviously do have the ability to stop gambling when all your cash is gone so therefore you are not completely powerless against it. I don’t know why I chose to post on your thread in the first place I’ve read thousands of threads on here over the years I used to post on lots, especially the ones similar to yours (which I think is oozing with denial), nevertheless I’m not posting here to antagonise you I’m posting here because I’d like to think I can help and support you.
Day 20 but still no mention of any positive steps you are taking to keep gambling at a distance, please pull your finger out or maybe you will end up at the end of the road to ruin, and it aint nice there.
I walked the road to ruin for over 30 years, currently I think I’m getting a taxi back to where I started; a gambling free life. One day at a time of course.