We call them different names, but to me they all mean the same. I know for me I have been through a number of relapses in my recovery journey. I would go for a week or two before I joined GT and then I would be back full swing gambling. I know now that I was lying to myself when I thought I could control it. I did not want to give up my friend. The thought of never gambling again would cause me to panic. Now, I don’t think about never playing those machines again, all I think about is today. I know that for today I will not gamble. I did not realize how important it was to just focus on today. I know that I am a work in progress who is working recovery. I still have lots of work to do on myself, but I am learning so much about myself on this journey. All I would suggest to anyone is to put barriers in place so that you have no access to cash/money. If we don’t have money we can’t gamble. I also found counseling helped me tremendously. Also the GT helpline saved me and Harry challenged me so many times, and the chat room, and topic room with Charles. I also find that posting on GT and reading other’s post help. The support of others on GT who understand is also very important. It does not matter how much gamble free time we have, as a compulsive gambler we can’t get complacent. I know at first I kept wanting to go back and win some of the money that I had lost. It took me a long time to accept that it is not my money any longer, it is gone and I gambled it away!!!! We are all the same when it comes to placing our next bet!!! You can do it!!!
