I has been bingeing on food lately. I gave up staying abstinent after 2 days this time. I become 2 kg heavier and was slow jogging 1km lesser in distance.
Recovery is all hard work for me.
Without a routine structured lifestyle, a spiritual and recovery program to follow, practice and check me. I could easily switch into the relapse mode and spiral out of control at any time without notice. If it did not happen now, the answer is not yet!
It was all about stop digging when you are in the hole and start to REFOCUS on staying abstinent today ONE DAY AT A TIME. There was no failure, it was just a part of my journey.
My progress with my eating disorder reflect on my relationship with alcohol, porn, gambling, borrowing, money and work. It was the same illness.
I had thoughts to take alcohol and gamble last night.
