Very well expressed Thea…So it sounds like the key for you is to "push through" when you have those feelings/anxieties and not let the gambling be the first thing that takes hold…Just keep moving forward..and it sounds like you are doing it…It is just like a **** or a cigarette…taking that first misstep is the problem…It’s just so much easier NOT doing that because the initial withdrawal is the hardest..In my case, however, I have to keep coming back in spite of slips…There is no other way..The alternative is to go straight down and not recover…and I must always try!
I, like you, think the shame or regret over what I have done has become an obstacle for me moving in another direction…My biggest issue is my career..I used to have professional jobs and would get whichever one I chose…Since the economy changed and I am now 60 years old, I am thinking I cannot get back to that, and when that fact displays itself to me, I get frustrated, withdraw and go gamble!I quit even LOOKING for jobs over a year ago..I am afraid and convinced I will not the get the jobs I would seek.. Not the way to move forward..That being said…I am working…I am making money and am paying down my huge debt…Now down to $12,500 from 80K..
So thank you for putting all that into words…because that is providing some clarity for me…
Hope all is well and calm and clear for you today…I am feeling pretty good with no urges so ****** for today!
