There isnt really any outside help… Yes I can indeed see shouting at them isnt the answer, but at the same time I am called some horrible things also. Not as much by my nan, but my mum. Even when growing up I had all sorts off her like saying im no son of hers, she wishes I get the disease, she said she wishes my nan was dead. The list is endless really, so in an argument things like that are said, so its even harder to keep my cool. Most of the strain in the house is down to my mum…. and not directly because of her illness. Its the way she wants constantly. My nan is elderly so surely my mum should think before constantly calling her, or causing arguments over getting her own way (which puts extra strain and work on my nan).
I didnt moan about the shopping though. In fact when it comes to spending on myself I find it difficult to do, but when spending on others its always been a bit easier. The whole point was regardless of loans and whatnot, I pay as much rent here and money back as possible each month as it stands. In fact my mum takes that money automatically as shes in control of my cash. Im left with the £30 a week budget, of which I spend some of on shopping for them. She was pretty much expecting me to give them extra cash out of that budget. I cant really afford it out of that low amount anyway but buying shopping for the home I thought would of counted towards giving then extra cash. I also pay bills such as internet which my mum uses as much as me and I never ask her for a penny for.
Yea its fair about xmas time. But again really the gambling is a disease. Its made me, like many, do things they never would of considered. Its fact that problem gamblers brains work differently. Even so, I have still done well I think, in just 3 months I have paid £800 or so back. Pretty much half the money already.
Yea I can see its her choice that I could be cut out of the will. At the same time with things, it hasnt been easy for me either, like rather than be out with friends I have helped out as much as I could at home. My gambling addiction maybe was encouraged more from when I was a kid. Of course it wasnt intentional to give me an addiction, but as young as 10 family members dragged me into the bookies. How? well back then the law was 16 to go into bookies. My uncle enjoyed gambling on the horses. Often when I was in town with him he wanted a gamble, and there were a few bookies who would allow me to sit on a chair inside and wait for him to gamble. I remember the smoke filled rooms, the chairs being so high it was a mountain to climb. A lot of the time I would sit there for an hour or 2, until he had finished which some***** if he had a win he would give me £10 or something. Every Saturday there would be horse racing on tv here, I would be taken for days out at actual horse racing events and around the age of 14 had my first gamble online. In fact my uncle wanted to gamble online but didnt know how to set it up, my mum asked if I could do it for him, so I installed a casino, and I remember him saying to fund the account with £50, then I got to have a few hands of blackjack. On that occasion I remember getting the balance to £100, but then slipping it away and losing the lot.
Now regardless of who is or isnt to blame, I know its been a hard childhood and of course it is hard ***** now, not being on the will means as theres no intermediate close family apart from me, the house could end up getting repossessed, ill end up homeless and seriously be in trouble with very few jobs going and low wages from my current job.
I cant see many new measures at all really. Of course my last slip was down to having access to ebanking, iv already closed my E-wallet, and my ebanking account too. So theres no no way I can even see what money I have, let alone touch it.
Yea your right with the trigger, its difficult to prevent however. Talking to my mum and nan to explain things is a losing battle, they refuse any outside help, I cant even afford to move out. In fact though if with my girlfriend here or away thats the time where that trigger is removed. But its when I come back that the trigger starts up again.
