Havent heard much from people on here recently, hows everyones recovery coming along?
Last night was horrible in the end, had to go to bed because I was craving really bad but knew I couldnt gamble due to no funds, no way to and I was fighting it off.
Today actually started really well. Had work. Decided this morning that 100% im not going for a pint or 2 after work. A very good step indeed regarding learning the value of money. Also I saw bus fare has gone up which is a ripoff so am saving even more cash by walking to and from work every day.
Got home from work and felt pretty good really. In fact I did some maths regarding money over 5 months. By not getting the bus I save around £3 a day (for the days I work a week…4 days), also by limiting my pub visits from twice a week (5 pints 1 day, 2 pints another day) to just 2 pints 1 day with the girlfriend I save something like £450 in 5 months.
Actually was having a very constructive evening, getting the paid surveys and clicks done on sites (which gives me a further £20 a month), until I sat in the front room.
Was watching something on tv and a gambling ad came on TV. Now it wasnt just any gambling ad. It was for a website that really helped throw me off the rails. They had tactics in place which meant my big withdrawal was kept as reversible for as long as possible so I got tempted and lost it. In fact it was longer than any other site….5 working days. Even after that time it was still reversible and when I emailed support I waited another week, no reply from support and was still reversible. I recall a total of over 2 weeks passing and my withdrawal could still be reversed. Of course they were still feeding me emails with bonus offers and before long temptation came in and I reversed and lost the lot.
It was a clear tactic by them which set me off down my destructive route to where I am now. In fact it almost cost me my life as well with a failed suicide attempt. Until my time of hitting the ultimate low and quitting in this thread I just couldnt let go of the fact.
Anyway, seeing the tv ad just bought that thought back and made me feel pretty sick, sick that after all that, the stress and the upset they are pretty much sticking two fingers up at me and laughing.
