Well I have decided to post on my journal……………I am still gamble free and with that I am very happy but as always it is only ever one day at a time……..but having said that just for today I won’t gamble. I am many things in life and I am afraid to say I have caused a lot of pain to a lot of people, but…………..like all of us I cannot change what is in the past…..all I can do is work on being the best I can just for today and within doing that the present and the future will become a better place. The only thing I want to say and I am sure every compulsive gambler knows and feels is “when I did what I did meaning gambling I never meant to cause people any pain I really am a kind person I promise you that but when I gambled I know I never took other people feelings into consideration” to look back on what I just said has made me sad but I really mean this from the bottom of my heart when a compulsive gambler is in action they dont think of any of the consequences or any of the people they are going to hurt, they dont mean it I promise you it is just the way they feel and the addiction takes over and they just carry on gambling regardless. I make this statement and I swear on my life it is true, “I really truly love my wife and kids with all my heart and work so very hard for them (more than anyone could ever know) but even with all that the love for them alone wasn’t enough to make me stop gambling” I dont know how this comes across but I share it with all of you because it is the truth. Anyway I have said enough for tonight and like I say I am grateful to say I am still gamble free and just for today I will not gamble, thank you for listening and love to all, just for today my name is Maverick and I am a compulsive gambler who is very happy to be in recovery, take care all and wish you well.
