Originally posted by urbaldo
I Can’t Quit — I just can’t. …
… Maybe I am not ready to quit but it still hurts soo much. I hope I hit bottom soon, maybe then I can quit.
Good afternoon Urbaldo, my name is Larry (screen name paul315) and I am a Compulsive Gambler, my last bet was Aug 13, 2009. Welcome to GT, it is a place you can find help; you will also find the friendship of others that have experienced all the things that you have and have felt all the same hurt and guilt – you are not alone in your trouble.
In fact a year ago I could not quit either, and my gambling not-gambling ratio was reversed compared to yours; and to be honest, gambling was 100% of my life. Today my life is 100% gambling free; and this is the story of many who started out in your situation — as said above, you are not alone in your troubles.
The 1% that you give to gambling is more than enough to destroy a life; however the remaining 99% is causing far more damage and are ***** that in reality you are also gambling with your life. Thought your gambling binges are periodic, the intervals between are not used wisely, are not being used by you for constructive thinking or to make any necessary changes to your life. These extended gambling free periods more than likely are also causing nervousness, irritability, frustration, indecision and a continued breakdown in personal relationships; destroying your life even when not gambling.
Keep coming back to GT and participating in all the help it offers, you will find ways to help you make the needed changes during your so called non-gambling time and put barriers in place to combat this addiction. I would think that you are ready to quit or you would not be searching for ways to help; you may not have reached what you consider to be "rock bottom" but your own rock bottom is the point that you are when you stop. Any lower place is only what others see as your rock bottom. What looks to others as your rock bottom, when a CG hits that spot, they keep going not seeing themselves as being in that condition, the CG keeps digging themselves in deeper and deeper, far deeper than what others think until they reach the point that enough is enough — fortunately this point, your rock bottom, may find you still in procession of some of the things you hold dear.
God’s speed, use your Higher Power to guide and strengthen you.
p.s. read the post by Ken L at this site: Enough by Ken L ( https://www.gamblingtherapy.org/en-US/ShowThread.aspx?ID=529074 )
Larry"Day Two Is Another Day Behind" – With the help of a Higher Power, My 3G’s – God, GA, and GT, I will continue to be gambling free.