Liz sorry that you are having gambling urges, but you are doing fantastic by not gambling with all that you are going through, and as you know gambling is not the answer. I know that I would love to go and escape sometimes, and just forget everything for a little while, and just have some fun and excitement. In our minds we can think of all these things and forget the other side of it. The self loathing, hating ourselves and the despair that we lost so much money that we cant afford to lose, and then the urges are even stronger. I think it was good for me to type that out as sometimes when I think of playing the machines I remember only the escaping and excitement!!! What and when is the next little trip that you have planned? I think it is good to have something to look forward to as it can keep our focus on something positive. When are you going to see your Mother again? How is your living room looking with your new furniture? Are you planning to do anything else to your home? When is your Grandson coming to stay again? I am not being nosey with all my questions I am trying to get you thinking of other things and not urges. Take care Liz and be patient and kind to yourself. I almost forgot to wish you a Happy Independence Day!!!!One day at a time my sweet lord…
