Good morning, my name is Larry and I am a Compulsive Gambler, my last bet was August 13, 2009.
Today marks my 10th Month of being gambling free. It is a milestone that represents little in the way of official recognition with mementos, but calls for a special celebration on my part. 304 days of recovery has brought me from what was a reason for me to evade life, and taken me to pursuing life.
It the past I lied and planed around gambling events to get out of life events and obligations that would take from my gambling time. I was not only "reluctant to use ‘gambling money’ for normal expenditures"; I was defiant in using gambling time for normal activities.
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At my GA meeting last week I mentioned that I would not be there this Monday, the 14th. The reason was that I was going to celebrate with my granddaughter at her graduation from pre-school. While sharing this I mentioned that this was one of the many daily enjoyments that being gambling free has allowed me; then to justify such a trivial thing keeping me from a meeting, I jokingly mentioned that even if I was still gambling I could not even get out of this, it was a command attendance. Then it hit me, and hit me hard; if I was still gambling I would lie to her and upset her plans, I did it in the past concerning my joining in on other occasions and if still gambling, the overpowering pull of this addiction would cause me to do it again, it is the nature of the beast.
So today I am celebrating a minor, yet notable, milestone in preparation for a much grander, yet childish, celebration in a little girl’s growing up; and in continuing preparation for all the forthcoming and ongoing celebrations in my life.
Before this addiction controlled every part of my life; now that I am in Recovery and started applying the needed changes to my life, e.g., I will no longer lie to my family about being at events, I recognize that the choice is mine. I will no longer choose to satisfy a selfish urge that will fade in a few brief moments – yes the urges can be strong and demanding, yet nevertheless brief and harmless, over the choice of not to gamble and enjoy the many things of life – a choice to gamble having results that will last a far far more longer time, a choice that will hurt and will cause harm. We have two alternatives as CGs: to gamble, risking progressive deterioration or not to gamble, and develop a better way of life; we have only one choice.
One Day At A Time, They Add Up – and not just in gambling free time and milestones.
God’s speed.Larry"Day Two Is Another Day Behind" – With the help of a Higher Power, My 3G’s – God, GA, and GT, I will continue to be gambling free.
