Hi Debbie
I suspect that the annoyance you feel for yourself staying in the wrong environment, for as long as you did, comes out in anger at him and wanting bad things to happen to him.
When someone is so sad Debbie that they hurt something precious, then wishing them bad things is remembering them, which means, in my book, that you are allowing them in to your life to carry on hurting you.
If I allowed the addiction in my CG’s life to continue causing me anger and bitterness then I would be remembering it but it is a closed chapter – I am much further on. I have learned from it and I will use the experience to make me a better person – hence writing on here and caring about you.
The experience you had, which I know was bad, was part of ‘your’ life, ‘your’ experience and how you handle it now is all that matters. If we take bad experiences and turn them into something good then nothing is wasted and we can improve out lives.
Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent. Either stop this communication or look at what you have got now and how far you have come and be proud of who you are now. This woman should not be mentioning her brother to you – ask yourself why is she doing this? If she is doing it to upset you then she is succeeding – you have handled bigger things than this Debbie – you have controlled your addiction. You have strength, you have power. This is not worth your concern.
V
