[kin]

There are things that I have totally no control at all in life. I still cannot recognize everyone of them, sometime I made the mistake of trying to change something that I cannot control.

I will gamble for a quick fix and I drink to feel good.

In life, bad things can happen to good people who did no wrong, yet these good people don’t gamble for a quick fix or drink to escape the stress, pain and frustration.

Obviously there was something wrong with me.

I was not prepared for the burden, suffering and pain in recovery. When the load get too heavy and hot, I will drop everything and run. I did not want to finish the job.