I would like to make a few points
1. Did you chose to become a CG?
Ok so you’ve finally accepted you are a CG after years of trying to convince yourself your not.
2. Do you think that people should pay for their mistakes for the rest of their lives? ( I don’t mean pedophiles or hardened murders) but just normal people?
3. Do you think I don’t deserve the chance to make my life better, a chance to live and enjoy the smaller things in life? Because if you do think every person on here should be given that chance, why shouldn’t you?
4. Do you feel sorry for yourself? Or your family and your mistake? It’s all about reassessing how you feel. The key word is feel. If you feel sorry for yourself? You need to ask yourself why. If you feel sorry for your family and your mistake, then you are doing the right thing by trying to change and make it better. When someone tries to mend things, that usually means they are truly sorry.
5. Where is regret going to get you? Where’s guilt going to get you? Just be sorry and make it better.
6. Do you want to be happy? I mean really happy? If so, what do you have to do to be happy? You’ve taken the 1st step by trying to stop gambling. Is it helpful to your situation to stop gambling? If so, what else would be helpful?
7. Do you want to forgive yourself? It’s ok to say.. I got it wrong, I’m going to learn from this. I want to be a better person. I deserve some joy in my life. I want some joy in my life. I want to be trust worthy so I’m going to work towards that.
8. Is CG an illness? I believe it is. I did not want this ever! I doubt you do either. If you believe it’s an illness then..
Ok no one made us gamble.. We chose that.. But some people can gamble safely. Because they are not compulsive. The compulsion is the illness bit. We did NOT choose that. We did not know what gambling was going to lead to.. Otherwise, we would have never gambled in the first place. We did not chose illness, it chose us.
But we do have a choice to fix it and make it better. You’ve made that choice. Be proud of that!
Yes 3 yrs ago, you knew there was a problem. But did you foresee the last three years since recognising the problem? No, you believed you could recoop some money, you could control it. Hence why you continued.. Like me. If you could foresee how you would feel now.. Would you have carried on? I doubt it.. Unless you have munchausen syndrome. You have an illness. People that are told that they need to watch there diets because they are developing diabetes very often go into denial.. And continue to eat inappropriately. Then suddenly BAM they end up with type 2 diabetes. Still doesn’t mean they go on insulin, they can manage it with diet. If they carry on ignoring it then yes, they will have to be treated. Are they bad people? I don’t think so, they just didn’t believe it would get that bad. So then they accept treatment and get on with they’re lives. They enjoy social gatherings etc.. But they don’t eat sugary foods so they can live. Point is, your not a bad person. And you have an illness. So as Long as you stay away from sugar and accept treatment, you can and will have a full life. And you deserve it.
It’s ok to make mistake, it’s ok to say sorry to your family but most importantly, say sorry to yourself, and choose life. If your sorry… It’s time to move forward, forget the past. It’s time for a new and better you.
Take care