Well it lasted less than a week, the shitty attitude, don’t give a damn about anyone else and shift the blame for anything and everything onto anyone else except himself.
Every single aspect of his life that can possibly be blamed on someone else is.
He says he doesn’t want to live at home, he hates it as we “control” him so he says.
Great, fine, don’t live at home where the cost of you living at home far exceeds the amount you pay in rent. Go and get you own place and stand on your own two feet. Go and find a job with prospects so that your salary will increase, there will be promotion prospects and you will be able to live comfortably in your own home.
Right,OK yes, I’ll do that tomorrow. I’ve got an important shoot em up game to play at this moment. I don’t want a second job to help with my income, as it will impact on my social life, which is almost entirely based around sitting in a room on my own and shooting people. Outside of my work, I converse with approximately zero people, including my parents who I currently live with.
So, he’s been back about a week and we hit the normal argument last night, which went on until well after 2.00am – well that ok as he doesn’t get up until the afternoon and I need to be at work by 7.00am.
So today he has his 4 weekly meeting with the psychiatric nurse which, in his mind, constitutes getting the help he needs. Rehab is a far too “extreme option” which he doesn’t need, as he’s got it under control himself. Well that will be an interesting conversation then, I’ve got it under control but I’ve gambled heavily since we last met. He doesn’t see that rehab ISN’T extreme it’s probably the best chance he has of beating this.
In an earlier, less volatile conversation, I asked him what he thought his “triggers” were to gamble. Boredom and anger were his two main answers. So why continuously play a shootem up game that you know makes you angry then? Ah, its not the game, according to him, its me or his mum moaning at him for playing, or stopping him from doing so that makes him angry. Ah yes, of course. Its someone else’s fault.
I think he’s gambled again already since he admitted to the last one. The behaviour pattern cycle tells me he has, as the anger and aggression that pours out of him at the moment has always been a sign that in a week or two, an admission will come and that will get it off his chest for a bit. He wont admit to it now, its probably too close to the actual event so its too raw and connected in his own mind still. Give it a week or so so that his mind can disconnect the impact it has had on him and we might get somewhere. I’m not sure that he will make it that long before being thrown out again. Our tolerance of him and his determination not to get help is massively diminished.
It’s entirely possible we are actually on the no steps forward and five steps back bit actually at the moment. Time will tell.