had another set back, and am trying to pay back what I spent. I am hoping I can get it paid back so that I don’t have to face the music. I won’t risk telling my hubby that I went a second time. He gave me another chance so I am afraid if he found out It might be the last straw. I hope that the fear I’m feeling will be bad enough to keep me away. I hope so.
I am going to try a few more hypnosis sessions while I wait for my doctors appts. I’m so pissed with myself right now for choosing to go. I can get passed this in time as long as I can keep paying this off. It will take me about 3 months to get back to where I was. 🙁 Why is this so hard???
I have never had to face anything as hard as this madness.
Being a survivor I find it hard to believe this is the thing that could take me down.
I looked into a councillar but haven’t had much luck yet.
I have so much good in my life, its hard to believe I am risking so much to feed this addiction.
I am going to try harder to fight back though, because I want to come out on top and not give into this mind bending urge to gamble. FG
