Thought I would make a start, but where? how?
I am a fifty year old male, currently living and working in Belgium and I have an uncontrollable gambling addiction. This has lost me my fiancee as she has had enough, she has moved away and doesn’t want anything to do with me – she had a gambler as her previous partner and has run to the hills. I had hoped she would understand, which is one of the reasons I told her. I have no money and my credit cards are maxed out.
My father – who was my main support – died and I came back to the UK to arrange the funeral and sort things out.
The funeral was Friday and was an awful affair, just me, the vicar and his wife. I just couldn’t come into chat last night I was in no fit state.
Today I have written a few new lists as suggested by Charles, I have labelled them each day of the week and will try to work through them fully each day.
I’m fifty yet now feel a little lost lad, I have no family, friends are few and far between, and I am lost. Right now I cannot gamble as I am using my works laptop that I brought over with me, they have a tracking system on it that shows where you go, so I dare not let work find out that I gamble.
I feel like my life is on hold while I am over here, I have too much to sort out to even begin to think about where to start with my finances and stopping my gambling. I know I will be going back to Belgium next weekend I think, if everything is done over here.
I just want to run away, take no cards with me, leave the debt behind and somehow survive from doing maybe odd jobs or bar work so I don’t have any real money worries.
Would that be so bad a thing to do? Running from my debt, would it save my destruction from gambling, I don’t know.
That was hard, I will try and return to chat this week.