Murr,
you have your whole life ahead of you. If you could only accept your losses to begin with and let it go. Steev has written a very useful post about chasing losses in the recovery section…
it will get worse if you keep at it. It can only get worse. If I hadn’t said no more after my last relapse losing £3900 I know for a fact I would have 0 left in the bank for my house deposit
let go my friend and focus on staying gamble free .
if spending is your trigger should you be considerimg going on holiday and borrowing and spending more money? Will you be away from casinos there? Do you have enough obstacles in place to stop you from gambling again. its clear that you have to be vigilant now to really give your recovery priority.
give yourself a chance to step back from this madness. The debt will only get higher if you choose to continue. I believe you can, you like me stepped away from it for years, completely forgetting it existed.
Do do it again murr. Turn away from it for good. Do it for you.