I can tell that I am not in a very good zone now. My food addiction has gone full blown relapse and I have put on almost 9 kg after losing them recently. I lose my discipline and self control totally in life as a result.
I have to stop digging my grave. I will need to do it the only way I know; one baby step at a time, total abstinent one day at a time.
It is useless to complain why me, I was given the chance to experience what it was like to be struggling with so many addictions; sometime all of them do go to sleep at the same time; workaholism, alcoholism, gambling, food etc. but many times at least one of them is awake.
I would sink underwater again and again, each time threatening to drown me but I continue to keep myself alive to tell this story.