Hello Mike. I’m pleased that you have the determination to carry on with recovery and it was a good thing to see you being so honest in the group. Believe me you cant beat this by yourself and your support will be next to useless if you’re not honest about things.
I was a resident in gm in 2009, I was there for twelve months, 3 of those in the halfway house. It was my third stint in what was then Gordon House. But please don’t think that it cant be very good then. The first time I went there was no support regime and I think it was run by the probation service for ex-cons who had been inside for gambling related things. I was 19, their youngest ever resident back then. 20 years later I was back again and went to the house in Dudley, to be honest I dont think I was ready. But this time, 2009, I was ready. My life most certainly has changed a lot .It has taken a long time but summing everything up; I have a lot now that I never would have had without the help I received in GH. One thing that I have now is a conscience.
I havn’t been gambling free since I left GH yes its very disappointing especially as there was absolutely no need for me to gamble. I made the decision to gamble each and every time. Now each and every day I make the decision not to gamble. It really is as simple as getting through today. I find that by talking about things, just normal things, having conversations, whether on the phone or face to face is a big help. When you live alone, as you know, it is very very easy to become reclusive and this really can be a dangerous place for compulsive gamblers.
I know that the GM/GH programme has changed a lot but am sure you would have been asked before you left what you would do in certain situations, and although I dont know you I would think you would have answered by saying you would ring somebody when you experienced stressful and difficult times or if you were feeling bored and/or lonely. It does work its been my salvation. If you don’t talk honestly and keep things to yourself you will eventually have to get things out of your system one way or another.
Hope to see you in the group again and keep posting. You know that you can get through one day without gambling that’s all you need to do, one day at a time.
Wishing you well.
Geordie.