[Callmecrazy]

I cannot escape into gambling so I’m stuck with all sorts of ugly feelings:
– how could I lose control so much?
– when people lose control in such a way do they die?
– will things ever get better for me? Will things ever change? will I ever find a better job? Fall in love?
– why doesn’t anything ever change for the better?
– how long can I cope with a job where 8hr seems like 16hrs?
Urgh.

Emma, the advice on selling things is great. I’m going to do that when I get better.