Hi i can relate to your problem, i too live with a compulsive gambler and it took a year for me to be with him and fall in love with him before he told me his addiction. By that time it was too late and i’d stay with him regardless of how bad his problem was. Really naive of me i guess but thats what love does it blinds u.
I’ve been with my boyfriend for 7 years now and we both love eah other. I gave him an ultimatum though which u might find helpful in your finance situation. He was gambling his wages literally 10 minutes of it going in his bank and when we moved in to a place i told him your going to give me your debit card and i will be in control of the rent and bill money etc. If you dont want to do that i can’t live with you and we can’t be together. He knew inside he couldnt be responsible for the bills due to his gambling problem. I also set up the online banking app with his bank coz i had access to his debit card and i was living at his address at home at the time after we had our son i lived with his mum and brother. So i could open his post and get the online banking sorted so i have direct access to his wage and put bill money aside etc. But with the rest oft he money left i had no chhoice but to keep some back for petrol, fags and other expenditures throughout the month otherwise id be left paying everything.
It has got easier for me in the last 3 years of our relationship and our son has brought us together. Unfortunately he hasnt seeked help and i think it will take a massive shock to the system until he does. He has admitted he has a really bad gambling problem which is a big step.
I hope this helped for you and that it shows yout not alone.
Take care
