Hi Squirrel,
Part of recovery is accepting the things we cannot change. Feeling guilty will not change the past but will take the joy out of the present .
Squirrel when someone ends their life might seem like the easy way out but it is a life sentence for those left behind – their lives are forever changed – the will live with the trauma forever.
Trust me when I say it is much easier to deal with a loved one’s debt, theft, addiction , crime … anything is easier to deal with .
If you are having thoughts of suicide, please see your GP or contact the Samaritans . A little help is sometimes all it takes to have a happier view of our world .
Keep posting Squirrel.