Hi Southside, well done on coming to the forums. You are in the right place to get support for your addiction. It sounds as if you are a strong willed person, with a determination to change you life. Life without gambling is wonderful, so I am told. I certainly had no problem with gambling before 3 years ago, and then it sucked everything out of me drip drip drip. I have neglected my family, my business, my self. I am now dried up and shrivelled. Today is day 8 for me. My last 2 relapses were horrific, and I could have lost almost 10K. The fact I finished up means my faulty thinking still wants to play. I have moved from medium stakes poker to high stakes BlackJack.
I am on medication for depression brought on by the gambling. I have had so many opportunities to quit in the past which would have meant I am not in this place now. But I have to see this present for what it is – the endless now. If I start to make better decisions now, they will improve my future, which now seems bleak.
I hope you keep posting, and that it can achieve your plan one day at a time.
Many thanks
Keep posting with your progress, use the support groups and believe in yourself.