Just read the lovely post u shared on sherrie’s journal. Lovely analogy. Kin often talks of cracked pots and the filling of those cracks with gold a beautiful analogy.
In my last gamble I won around 3500 pounds sterling, then I put it all back in a 48 hour binge plus my rent and cleaned myself out to 0 with no income coming in. I hit destitution so I know how u feel. Over time we all lost huge amounts, to come 10,000 is a huge amount, others lost much more in binges. It has gone, when we are able to accept this firstly and then forgive ourselves for having this addiction, not asking for it, but ending up with it anyway.
And beware payday. I was lucky in some respects if you can look at it that way in that for nine whole months I had nothing. But every week with pay coming in when in action I straight away wentto gamble it as soon as it came in. So, how r u going to protect yourself when your pay comes in? What barriers do u have in place?
And u r not alone, we have all been there, that period of having nothing at all, getting by on scraps, and I also know that it will pass, as it did with me after nine months of nothing.
