Hi M
A gamble-free holiday sounds like just what the doctor ordered – the more gamble-free times for you and your daughter the more good memories for her to look back on. Too many upsets and failed promises will add up for her. You are giving her what she needs, protection and love. If and when her father sorts his life out his daughter will be healthy and happy and not wrecked by his addiction – that will be down to you.
In my opinion (and this really is ‘my’ opinion) your partner cannot appreciate the size of the job he has placed upon you and probably never will – you are the steel backbone, the silent carer that your daughter needs to help her grow. The reward comes in seeing her grow into a happy young woman that the addiction failed to hurt. Of course you will feel anger and there will be ups and down, it is only natural but you are doing well.
The boundaries are hard and blurred by having to protect your daughter – ‘you’ are the ring fence around her. Maybe if you looked at the way you protect her it will help you protect yourself because you are determined that the addiction will not hurt her.
I hope the school holidays are proving enjoyable – the weather is mixed but thankfully there are a lot of fine days.
Speak soon
V
