Hi Jsere
Trust takes years to rebuild once it has been damaged and It is not your job to find out how to trust – if you do not trust your partner then trust your gut instinct.
Maybe you could download the Gamblers Anonymous 20 questions from their website and let your partner see that you are treating his addiction seriously, even if he is not.
Many CGs go to meetings because they are either told to go or they think it will please those who care about them but they don’t really want to change the way they behave. They come home and say that they can do it on their own, as your partner has done, or say they are not as bad as the others at the meeting – this is denial.
I hope the money that you have moved into a safe account is really safe in your name and that he does not know the pin number or have any other access to it because you will need to protect your finances for you and your son.
You ask whether you have rights to ask where your partner spends his money – I don’t think ‘rights’ come into it with a CG. If he asked you to handle his finances, which many CG who want to live gamble-free do, then it is ok to ask for receipts but an active CG who wants to gamble will do so with or without your knowledge.
Keep posting Jesere – I think reading other posts is a great idea.
Velvet
