Nice to meet you here, well done for coming here and being honest and opening up about your addiction. It is a hard thing to do at first. You have taken that first step.
Firstly, if you are feeling suicidal you need to ask for professional help, see your doctor. Call the samaritans, call a lifeline. Do what you have to to keep yourself safe. Acknowledging those thoughts is the first step too. Your doctor will be able to guide you to the best plan to help you with that. As for gambling this is the right place to deal with that. There are also gamblers anonymous meetings, counselling, banning from places you gamble or putting blockers on line. Limiting access to money, getting someone to help look after your money.
You can read here, journal here, join groups that are on, talk to one on one advisors here. When you feel like gambling try to delay it, delay the impulse and wait it out for even half hour at a time, just get through the next half hour etc.. also filling the void and creating new hobbies, new experiences.
At first it may take time to feel the joy in other things but it will come, gambling numbs us for a while too sometimes, and puts a cloud over our life but staying away from gambling gets progressively better and the sun begins to shine again. It is possible. Use all the support you can, just reach out, ask for help in whichever area you need it.
P