Hi Jon, it is never too late for recovery.
When it comes to telling your wife there is never going to be an easy way. What does help though is not just to present the problem; you can also show what you are going to DO to address the problem. Get back to GA meetings, show her this site, we also have a Family Forum where she can get support as well, tie up your finances, talk to your dad and tell him what has happened and ask him not to bail out/lend you any more money. the sort of thing that will help you stop gambling are the same thigns that might help rebuild trust etc. No guarantees there of course but you are going to have a future, you are your son’s Dad howver your relationship with your wife works out, you are going to have future relationships – hopefully with your current partner but if not you aren’t going to become a monk. By stopping gamblign for YOU you will be beter placed whatever happens.
Vera has given you some good suggestions but
“……not sure I’m ready for any of it…..”
I guess the question you need to ask yourself is if you aren’t ready for it now then when? 50k debts? 100k? The advice we don’t want to hear is usually the advcie which will help us stop gambling.
I’m not sure which country you are in but there are plenty of financial options available these days and plenty of free advice agencies to help you get things to a manageable position. Stop gambling and there is always a way to sort things out.
Keep posting and let us know what positive steps you are taking.