Hi John. Perhaps you need to speak to someone about your loss. You are deeply in grief! Gambling won’t help as you realise. Of course you are at a low ebb right now but things wl improve. Alcohol as you know is a depressant.My world always looks really bleak the day after alcohol.
Don’t be too hard on yourself right now. Yes you can get around gambling blocks but when u are determined to stop, they can give you that valuable time to think things through .. Through to the end of a gambling session when you realise you money is all gone ! There are quite a few of us who have just stopped gambling. Join in the groups and we will a support each other!! You will do it John. Be kind to yourself.eat well , relax, take exercise. Give yourself time and permission to grieve. Put those barriers in place. They will remove the impulsiveness from the situation. Things will get better.