Hi Jen,
Welcome to the forum, this is a good first step that you have taken. Jappy and i-did-it have posted some great advice on what to do from here. Since your husband already knows about your problem, I would highly recommend surrendering control of your finances for now to him. This will not be permanent, but you are unable to handle money management in your current situation. I would go up to him and tell him you are sorry for everything that has happened, and you are working on putting this mess behind you. Ask him if he will help, it is the most powerful tool you have.
“I don’t want to spend another dollar on a bet, but I don’t want to give it up either.” This line is very conflicting. You know that gambling is ruining your life and your relationship, yet you do not want to give it up. I know what you mean in this, you do not want to give up that feel. It is important to know why we gamble in the first place. Like a lot of other people, I do it for the excitement. I do it for the uncertainty. I know I will most likely lose, but I intend to find out. Here’s the thing though, even if you do end up winning, you will just put it right back. We all have, the system is designed to keep you playing until it takes everything. It is pretty devastating.
Beating an addiction requires a total lifestyle change. Whether it be setting new goals, or exploring new hobbies, your brain chemistry changes based on your behaviors. For me, setting new goals for myself has helped tremendously. I am fairly young (29), and I want to buy a house someday. Anytime I get an urge to gamble, I promised myself that I would not act on impulse. I would discuss it with myself before placing a bet, no matter how hard the cravings. Actually, I had an urge last night, and this was the first one in 25 days. I acknowledged it, and decided to write a post on here before acting, but I also reminded myself that if I did act on it, I would be put further away from my goals. Just some little techniques that I hope will help you.
–Nick