Hi Ivy
Well I am glad you have stopped bobbing in and out and have taken the time to start a thread. Bobbing is alright when you have your head above water but not so good when you are being dragged down. Hopefully your time here will help you stay afloat until you reach dry land.
Well done on getting the mortgage in your own name – you have done the right thing safe-guarding your children’s home.
I am not sure I have understood your words correctly but did you put the blocks on your husband’s phone and internet because he wanted you to do so – in other words, does he accept he has an addiction and has he asked for your support?
We cannot stop our loved ones gambling – only they can do that. We can support if there is a willingness to change on the part of the CG (compulsive gambler) but we cannot force that change. Some years ago I witnessed a man unwillingly brought to a GA meeting by his desperate wife, mother and daughter – sadly, I never heard that he had returned.
The addiction to gamble is nothing to do with money – money is a means to an end, a tool to indulge an addiction that hurts those with it and those around it. Is your husband working and covering his debts or is he seeking enablement from you and/or others? What is it about his behaviour that upsets you the most? Is he always a good dad and step-dad or do the boys know that something is amiss? Are you staying with him just for the boys?
Keep posting Ivy – the first post is the hardest. Sorry for so many questions but it helps to put flesh on the bones of your experience. Knowledge of your husband’s addiction will give you power over it and with that knowledge hopefully you will find the brake on the roundabout, giving you time to slow it down until you can decide what is right for you.
Velvet
