Thanks for your post and I am glad the flu abated for a while. Was thinking about you last night and wishing you well.
The truth is that I am still destitute, bankrupt and stuck. There isn’t a magic wand here or a turning point that says, yes, everything is better. Cos it simply isn’t. So no, I am nowhere near where I would want to be. My gut problems are much better than they were after some six months of horrible symptoms so I am very grateful for that.
I do agree with you though about deserving good things. I deserve so much more than i have been granted in this life. Just to have one more opportunity to be able to recover my life sometimes seems like too much to ask for, but I am asking for exactly that. Yes, I threw everything away and to this day I don’t understand fully why, and yet I do. I couldn’t see a future even though I had planned for what I would do in my later years as a career but through some strange twist that was all taken away. I also blew the small pension I was due on gambling. So it is hard to start again at 60, really hard. I simply don’t know if it is possible, and not much interests me, I have become a recluse, yet not a bitter and twisted recluse. I just don’t know if I have what it takes any more to rebuild my life.
My friend has texted me saying to go out and enjoy the sunshine but I don’t feel up to responding to her yet.
