Hi Geordie ,
I think I never remember having 25 days without a gamble.
Even as a child I used play cards for pennies
Yes this is new and this is good .
It is changing me too – maybe my character isn’t improving much – but my priorities seem to be rearranging themselves.
I am thinking of letting go management responsibilities at work and putting the time into family .
I am thinking I will lose a little pay but then I remember I have been using only a small fraction of my pay for living expenses .
I want to have the time to explore other things which I never could in the past.
Maybe I am simply losing my marbles – who asks to be demoted ?
Speaking wasn’t all that pleasant – I think i didn’t know where to start and there were so many people to talk. I ran out of steam very fast – maybe because I have lived like a saint !!
I think for me I have to accept that I cannot change – or I will never be cured
.i like other things that are happening in my life tho – I am getting my son back -we had been less close of late – little wonder when I have spent the Last eight years of his young life trying to get him to go and amuse himself – so mummy could amuse herself –
I have a quiet contentment growing inside me – it’s growing slowly and it’s partner is sadness –
Tonight I felt so deeply sad over my daddy – I felt like my guts were being pulled from deep inside me – and he died a decade ago .
I think maybe I am a little crazy and the gambling masked it . My moods are changing like never before – but then I am a lady of a certain agen so maybe that’s it .