Hi Diego
I wonder if your daughter senses your unhappiness over the new-found truth that she is not your biological child. I am sure she would love to have a good relationship with you if she knew that you could still see her as you had always done.
She is innocent in all this Diego and although I know you are too, you hold an important key to her future.
Your wife appears to have an addiction that she didn’t ask for and certainly will not want – a compulsive gambler would love more than anything to be able to gamble responsibly but sadly, for your wife, this will never happen.
27 years is a long marriage and I am sure you have enjoyed a lot of happiness alone the way – unfortunately you now have 2 seemingly insurmountable problems on your hands and only you can decide what you are going to go about them. Personally, I feel that the child needs you to be the father she has always believed you to be, the rock in the middle of what is a very turbulent life, for her, (and you) at the moment. My husband raised my 3 children who are not his biologically. He is he the most amazing Dad and adored by his children. They want to be like him, they want his approval they love him totally. We have had our ups and downs – the teenage years were hard but then growing up is not easy, however, the effort he put in over the years has paid off a million times over. The relationship between them is amazing.
You sound a decent man with a good moral compass – an excellent role model for a daughter whose mother has an addiction.
Finding out about your daughter has obviously knocked your confidence. – If it was me, in your situation, I would give myself time to think before I made any life-changing decisions. As you said, your daughter could become your greatest ally and that could be very special.
I do agree that you have had a raw deal and it is, therefore, important that you make the right decision for your future. Only you can make those decisions and I hope that sharing on here will help.
Keep posting
Velvet
