Hi Cathy
Well things are sort of stable at the moment. My son is back at home after about two/three weeks of being out of the home.
During that period we knew that something was amiss, because his whole attitude had taken a significant turn for the worse. Eventually the admission came, that he was not “dry gambling” or even losing £20, but £300 in two hours or so.
All the reasons why he told himself he didn’t need to go to GM or anywhere else, he had been living the lie for several weeks. We knew this, we just didn’t know how much was involved. I know its not about the amount of money.
So in coming home, HE committed to getting more/additional help. HE said he would, not me or my wife telling him had to. It doesn’t seem to be making much difference to him though, in his determination to do something about it. His brain has banished that to the darkened corners of forgotten about promises I think.
The problem he will find though, is that we have a much stronger resolve than we did previously. If he doesn’t do what he committed to, then he will be out of the house again, for an extended period of time. Its hard, but its the only way to get through to him.
He is still so resistant to doing what he says for himself. I don’t understand because I’ve never suffered from the addiction. Phone the helpline then, I say, and talk to people who have, who do understand you. Nope, doesn’t happen, because that would be admitting the problem exists. Yes, he says he knows he is an addict, but he says that because he thinks that gets us off his back.
So stable at the moment, but where we go from here I’m not sure yet!
Thank you for asking.
Cheers