Hi Caroline,
You raise a few questions there, let me try and work through them.
Are you “bound to have slips”? No, we are compulsive gamblers but a slip isn’t inevitable, if we tell ourselves that it is we are setting ourselves up for our next bet. I’d say that none of us can stop on our own but i know many people who haven’t gambled since their first GA meeting or Gordon House or other support.
Havign said that if someone does have a slip what happens next largely depends on what they learn from it . You gambled, what would have stopped/made it harder for you to do so? What can you do to make it less possible in the future? Where was it? have you now got yourself banned? How did you fund it? Can you make it harder to access money? That sort of thing.
“Is that how I live for rest of my life??” Again no, it does get easier. Though it’s not just the time since our last bet that makes it easier – its how much we work recovery. Find other thigns to fill our time, address character traits, take positive actions etc
You have been accepted into the residential programme? great you will find a lot of answers there. You will also get tools and strategies that you can use as you move forward in recovery. Then of course its up to you if and how you apply those tools.
What positiv steps can you take before going to Gordo Hose? where can you get banned from? Who could look after your money for you? What can you do instead of gambling next time you get an urge?
I look forward to hearing about the positive steps you are taking.