Hey velvet and charles, really appreciate you checking up on me and for the thoughtful words.
Not surprisingly, I blew a good chunk of my pay yesterday when the addiction told me to stay away from pit games but try my luck in poker because “I can be patient, play good, better odds, etc”
Once I relapse, it’s like literally impossible to just stop and think about other things no matter what I do. Unless I quit for a good 6 months or longer, the “withdrawal” symptoms are still lingering just waiting to strike at any moment…
Day 1, AGAIN. Feeling really pointless and frustrated right now. Sometimes I wonder, do I even want help? What is the point of self excluding yourself from one establishment if you’re just going to find another?
But, there’s no excuses. I did what I did and it is in the past. Be better today than yesterday. I hope you guys commit to staying gamble-free.