Hello John.
You said you have nothing left after 9 years of salary.
Seems to be a trend for us compulsive gamblers.
It’s not the amount of money lost, IMO, but the significance the amount lost in respect to income. For compulsive gamblers, this number is far too high to justify it as not being a problem.
I’ve gone so far as to figure (rough estimate, of course) the amount that I’ve lost – per day – for every day that I’ve been alive, since infancy. The amount is staggering and sobering.
Best of luck in your recovery my friend. That goes for all of us. Or, maybe luck is what we were trying for in addiction and now we need determination, conviction and education? Yeah, screw luck. too risky.
Just do it.