Yes, DD, it is heart wrenching for you, your siblings and for your mother.
Gambling is a ruthless addiction and has no respect for age, class, creed or gender.
My personal opinion, reading what you have written, is that your mum probably turned to gambling through loneliness and loss of her husband. Gambling can play the part of a “lover” and I know many women who were sucked in. I have seen them stroking and talking to slot machines as if to coax them into some positive response. Your mother feels upset and threatened because you are “taking her ‘lover’ away”.
My suggestion to you and your siblings would be to avoid mentioning the G word to your mother. Surprise her with some alternative activity ( a walk , a drive in the country side, a trip to the cinema, a meal out) to replace her gambling outings. She is not a young woman and as we know “old habits die hard” Twenty years is a long time to spend gambling, so as well as the addictive element it will have become habitual behaviour for you mam. Safeguarding her home is indeed the biggest and best thing you can do, but you also need to take steps to help her to restore and safeguard her dignity and preserve her self esteem.
In my experience, a lot of women continue to gamble because they falsely believe that gambling is their way of life and the only thing they can do well!
I am the mother of three grown up children.
I am a compulsive gambler.
