both my parents are alcoholic and my dad was a gambler and got my family into finically issues. My mother tried to hide it from us as we were young but I saw him on online sites all the time gambling. He is self employed and should have been out working but instead staid home using loans to gamble and abuse me. Is wore is never ever be like him. I’ve been through a phase where I’ve abused alcohol myself a few years ago and have stopped now but now since then I’ve turned to gambling online too. If I could stop drinking that means I have the power in me to stop gambling too… I hope.
I play online gambling sites. I know I should block them but I still believe if I go on just one more time I will win the money I need to pay back the loans. I know I need to block myself from being able to use them but I’m not sure I am ready to??
I have only just admitted there is a problem, after months of my friend telling me how badly addicted I am and what a mess I’m getting myself into over it. Not just finically but psychologically. I sometimes get very suicidal when I loose more money because I don’t ever know how il pay back all that I owe and with other issues that get me down I think the easiest way out is to commit suicide. ( don’t worry I have no intention on doing this right now).
It’s so good to be able to talk here. I have been hiding all this from my boyfriend. He keeps asking where all my money’s gone and he had to lend me some to buy food.
I’m ashamed of myself big time.